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Friday, September 15, 2023

8 Toxic Habits you should give up to be successful in the future


Habits are learned temperament to repeat previous responses to situations. Habits are context behavior associations that repeatedly develop with rewards for a given action. Goals and tips are essential to initiate behavior repetition to avoid unwanted habit performance. Habits develop with repetition but require intentions to start.

Research studies show that almost 46% of behaviors are repeated every day. People develop countless habits both consciously and unconsciously. Patterns can be negative or positive.

Does this situation seem familiar to you? You hit the gym once and then never again, whereas you decide to quit junk food, but you can’t stop consuming it. I can’t say for you, but I have countless times in this situation. You know working out is good for your body and mind and will help you out in the long run, but still, something is holding you back.

Somewhere deep down, we know these habits are bad for us, but we just can’t seem to let them go. It’s like a toxic relationship where you keep coming back time and again. It is proved that it is more difficult to give up on a harmful habit than form a positive one. You can’t use this as an excuse to give up on something because I did.

Let’s look at why adopting good habits is a difficult task for many.

  1. Too difficult –

You are more likely to perform your best when you are self-aware, and it starts with forming realistic goals. If you aren’t an active person, working out for continuously 2 hours on the first day is a bit improbable.

Setting up a straightforward and realistic goal will be a good start. You need to remember that one hour of anything equals 30 hours in a month, half an hour equals 15 hours. The goal is to develop a habit, and baby steps are a lot better than trying to jump all in and giving up too soon. The most important lesson here is being easy on yourself and building your way up from there.

  1. Reward Yourself –

Behavioral scientists and researchers have proved that you are 60% more likely to stick to a habit if you reward yourself after it. So reward yourself with a cheat day after working out continuously for one whole week. Go easy on yourself.

If you remember correctly, I mentioned in the previous part that slow steps will be more effective. Here is an example: Challenge yourself to go three days without any junk food, reward yourself on the fourth day. Do this for one whole week till you are confident you can add up one or two days. It might seem easy at first, but it is not easy.

Habits like weight loss, exercising, and giving up on an addiction take longer to show up. Rewarding yourself will help you stay on track and continue this in the longer run.  

  1. Do it every day –

It is difficult to wake up every day and go for a run, choose to eat healthy foods when all you want to do is munch a few cookies, or work on your goals when you want to lay down and binge watch Netflix.

It will be difficult but, the rewards are definitely worth it. Do it every day and increase the duration or difficulty in increments.

Do something every day at the same time. It can be anytime you are convenient in, night, day, or free. Not many people will tell you this that doing something every day will not lead to forming a habit ( Bummer!!); doing something every day at the same time will. You don’t have to believe this article, just try it out yourself and see the changes.

There are days when it just is not possible, like when you have to write a 2000 word article, and you use it as an excuse to convince yourself that it is OK to not work out today. But, these days are just exceptions, and it’s OK to cut yourself some slack but, try to follow a routine on other days.

To sum it up, start small, reward yourself, and do it daily. Starting is the first and the most challenging step, and once you have done it, there is no looking back. Most people give up after the first try. You don’t wanna be most people. It’s not going to be easy initially for sure, there will be days you will resort back to your old pattern, and it’s OK as long as you don’t give up.

Most people think habits are easy to form. The old school 21 days rule (Anything you constantly do for 21 days will be a habit). If only it were that easy, all of us would start making life-altering decisions. The thing is, even 120 days are short enough to form a habit. Habits are developed over time, and it differs with different people; some people find it challenging to create a routine that leads to forming a pattern whereas, it is slightly easier for some.

Everyone wants to be successful; only a few understand that habits are the only thing that will get you there. Take it from famous entrepreneurs, artists, actors, or any successful person in their field, and they will tell you habits are an integral part of their life.


  1. Procrastinating –

If you find yourself constantly procrastinating, you need to make a change right now. If you find yourself saying things like. “I’ll do it tomorrow,” “It will do it on some other day.” Scheduling your time correctly will help you get things done quickly and effectively.

If you are a procrastinator, getting on track will be difficult. Assign priority to your essential tasks and allot a time frame for them. Start small, and then build your way up. Focus on just one thing you need to do today and set a time duration for it.

For example, Complete 3 chapters within 1 hour. This one hour can be any time of the day; just make sure you get it done and don’t end up postponing it. 

  1. Victim mentality – 

The victim mentality can only get you so ahead in life. Taking accountability for your actions is the first step. Most people don’t want to accept that your reactions to circumstances determine your life. If you keep blaming everything on others, it will always be the same. You will always be on the other side of the road crying about your situation.

Most people are part of this never-ending toxic loop and can’t breakthrough. But, accept it or not, your life is entirely under your control. Your emotions, reactions to specific situations, people around you, all of these are under your control.

Self-awareness is the key to change. If you wanna work on yourself, you need to recognize toxic patterns.

We all know a person who is always a victim; maybe that’s you for others or someone else. Either way, letting go of the victim mentality and taking accountability for your actions will make your life so much better.

  1. Criticizing yourself-

We all have our demons, and it is much easier to criticize yourself than praise yourself. There is always this tiny voice in the back of your head calling you things like “Idiot!”, “How could you get it wrong,” “You are not enough,” and a lot more.

It’s crazy when you realize it’s your mind making you feel so bad about yourself and the primary point is that it happens in a subconscious part of our brain.

It isn’t going to change overnight. The only way around this is forgiving yourself and understanding that you are a human at the end of the day, and it’s excellent to make mistakes.

  1. Being afraid of failure-

I hope I did not hit a weak spot, from never confessing to your crush to starting on your big project idea. We have all been there. The fear of failure holding us back from giving our best. Thoughts like, “What if I fail?”, “What if all my hard work will go to waste” “What if it doesn’t work out?” and plenty more are always on our minds.

We are constantly searching for the next excuse not to get things done, but deep inside, it’s just fear of failure that stops you from reaching your potential. So instead of focusing on the negative, try a more positive approach like “What’s the worse that could happen if it did not work out?” and unless you are dying, it’s lovely.

“What if all my hard work goes to waste?” Surprise, surprise, you will have to work hard for everything in life. Why not do the same for your goals and the most common “What if it doesn’t work out?” so that you can try again. It’s not the end; there will be better things in the future. You need to believe and hold on.

  1. Perfectionism –

The idea of perfection is flawed in itself. No one is perfect; everyone is different in their way. There is nothing wrong with perfecting things; it is a problem, though, when it holds you back from even starting.

Most people don’t even start because they are afraid they will make mistakes on the first try, and you are going to; there should be no surprise. Everyone learns with time. Nothing will ever be perfect, no matter how hard you try. Improving 1% every day equals 30% in a month and 365% in a year.

Countless people want to get everything right on the first try, and it’s just impossible, so they don’t even bother trying.

  1. Multi-tasking-

Choose one thing at a time, devote all your attention to it, and get it done right. Too many things on your boat will only end up drowning it. On the other hand, if you are focused on too many things at once, chances are you won’t get anything done or, worse do everything wrong.

Successful people understand the importance of focusing their attention on one thing at a time. Therefore, they don’t overburden themselves with too many tasks at a time.

  1. Toxic people –

These kinds of people range from narcissists to self-centered freaks, and the worst part is they are always around you. People you spend most of your time with add up to who you become.

If you spend time with people who are less accomplished than you, they will try to hold you back always instead; if you spend time with people successful than you, you will have more opportunities.

  1. Comparing yourself to others-

With the advent of social media, it is easier to compare yourself to others online. Comparing your success, your body, lifestyle is a common thing. But, the other side of the grass always looks greener.

No one is going to show their worst parts online. No one will broadcast their failures, failed relationships, etc., online. Comparing yourself to others will do you no good as most people pretend to be someone else.

Companies pay influencers to endorse their products and to increase their revenue. Companies wouldn’t end up making any profit, and influencers wouldn’t have a job if they didn’t make you feel bad about your life, clothes, relationship, and so much more. There are always two sides to a coin, and most people only broadcast the one that shines the most. Not everything you see online is true. Something is holding


Everyone is different, and so will be your qualities. You might need to let go of certain toxic traits than others. Overall, we are all allowed to make mistakes at the end of the day, and there will always be room to improve as long as we want to change.

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